Author: Mitzi

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Constructive Criticism Sold Here!

Recently I’ve noticed a number of close friends, minor acquaintances, and friends of friends who have been either getting engaged, getting married, having babies, buying homes, moving in together, etc. and being surrounded by all of this I can’t help but be aware of my age and thinking “What the hell am I doing?”

If you know me, you know that I am not in any way a babymaker or homemaker. I’m not saying I want to settle down, get married, buy a house and start raising a family. Not right now anyway and for some of those things possibly not ever. I guess I just feel like everyone around me is moving through life and I’m just… not.

The silly part is that I’ve always told myself, and others, that I believe everyone works on their own time line and that things happen to everyone when they should happen (not bad things but you know, “things” in general). Despite my personal philosophy though, it’s hard to not notice when the life timelines of everyone else seems to be on the same track and mine is just not.  It’s sort of like knowing you can’t attend a party but feeling a little left out because you didn’t receive an invitation. Which, of course, is irrational and totally stupid.

It makes me wonder if maybe, possibly… there’s something wrong with me.

I know what you’re thinking, “What?! NO! There’s nothing wrong with you. That stuff will happen to you too, it’s just not happening right now.” Or maybe you’re not thinking that at all and you’re actually thinking, “Yeah I can think of a few things wrong with you but I can’t tell you because that would be rude of me.” Of course all my friends are nice. They are decent people and they like me, so they would never think of telling me about the qualities about me that they dislike. So what I really need is to find someone to tell me what is wrong with me. There must be a person who can offer these services, right? Actually, I think that lady from Millionaire Matchmaker could probably do that, but she comes with a pretty hefty fee, the kind of money that I don’t have.

So if you’re reading this, and you’re my friend, next time I say something along the lines of: “What the hell is wrong with me?” You should definitely tell me. Think of it as doing me a favor.

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I went from negative to positive

A blog post entitled: I went from negative to positive

1. By next week I will have no credit card debit and be essentially debt free aside from my insignificant monthly student loan payment. Not that it isn’t a large total sum, I just have very small monthly payments, which I am fine with.

2. I’m a consumer. Not just in the “business vs consumer” kind of way but in the “every day I am finding new things I want to have/eat/see” kind of way. This means I have already made a mental list of things i want to have/eat/see.

3. My tax return is this year is the largest amount I’ve ever received from a tax return. This is not to say it’s amazingly huge. It’s just that I’ve never had a real job before, and never been at a company this long before, so it just makes sense that I’m making more than I have ever made before. So I’ve already made a mental list of things I want to spend my tax return on…

* hackintosh

* trip to Seattle

* bridesmaid dress (not really optional – but I can buy this with money from a paycheclk and not my tax return)

* new rain boots (even though rainy season in LA is pretty much over)

* trip to London

* new glasses

* trip to Oregon (for wedding, also not optional)

* various apparel items I have bookmarked that are so numerous I can’t even list them

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Another Door Closes

It’s over now. I am sad (but also relieved). I am sad because he was something different than anyone/thing I have ever had before and there is a fear there that I will never get someone like him again. I realize this is a superficial and irrational thought, still it’s there and it’s an honest thought.

Silly fears, silly worries, silly things I can’t change. But what makes this time different than any other time I’ve had before? Nothing really. Everything works the same way, the details are different but the motions (as in the motions one would go through) are all the same. I’ll be fine and this will be just another memory to add to the barrel of ones that didn’t work out. And therefore rational thought tells me I shouldn’t let it bother me too much.

I didn’t want it to end but then does anyone ever want things to end? I suppose in special circumstances, yes, but generally when people meet someone they really like they wan to keep that person around for as long as possible.

No, I think now I am mainly sad because I lost something that had the potential to be low maintenance. Something very easy. Mild. Which was all I wanted for once. It seems hard to come by nowadays.

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Level 27

I am now the ripe old age of 27. I bought a new faux leather jacket this weekend. I’m going to apply for my own passport soon. I feel like an adult now.

So I set up a dinner and drinks event for my birthday this year. Pictures can be found here. Ashima ended up booking a flight the morning of my birthday and flew down from SF for the weekend. We had a slumber party with Jamie that night after the bar and dinner hijinks. Had a girls day out on Sunday which included brunch, shopping, cupcakes and dinner.

In other news,  my friend Darren twittered the other day that he was looking into pet relocation services since he is thinking about moving to London and needs to get his Pancake over there. I eagerly volunteered myself for that service. I hope I actually get to go to England this year. I’ve never been to Europe and this seems like the perfect opportunity. I’m finally in a place where I actually might be able to afford it and would have someone to hang out with. So yeah. I’m quite excited about the possibility though nothing is for sure yet. I looked into passport services since I’m pretty sure mine is now expired. I’ve never applied for my own passport before.

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A year in photos

Are you ready for the cliche recap of the year in photos from my flickr?!  Well here they are in a vain attempt to show how much fun I “used to have” (and these are in no particular order other than the order they are in):

I lived alone for the first time!

Christie and I at Zombie Prom in San Francisco
Maxx, Piper, Misha and I don't know how to drive this damn thing.
President Obama got inaugurated
I hurt myself pretty bad on Valentine's Day
I got an iPhone!
Went to NYC again
Went to SF again
I went to Indianapolis, Indiana to visit an old friend for the first time!

and of course, made Turducken